psycholawgy | post of shame

[ Instead of grinning like an idiot though, this time he pauses half a second to wet his own lips, upper teeth dragging over his lower lip as her arm shifts. Finally, after a beat he sinks himself lower, onto her this time to kiss her a bit more deeply.

They really aren't going to get to breakfast at this rate. Ah. ]

[ she doesn't even realise how uncomfortable and cold the floor is now, and that's more than fine. she kisses him back, each kiss being slow and careful. her index finger resting on the back of his neck moves to rub his skin. it's a gentle touch, and one that'd probably make the hairs in his skin go up.

also this is already breakfast uwu ]

[ He ends up gasping into her mouth when her index finger rubs his skin, spine curling down into her, pushing her more into the floor. His mouth stutters against hers a little, his own hands moving to the floor to press there in the hope that he doesn't squish her. His head is swimming a little bit though.

She isn't just warm, she's hot and if it weren't for the fact that she acts like a grounding he might get too caught up when another memory swarms his brain. ]

[ it's a good thing whatever she ends up seeing is shortlived and is nothing of importance. it flashes by quickly that she doesn't notice it at all and she's just too caught up in kissing him.

she doesn't even realise when the memory finishes, but it's the same time her other hand takes his and she slowly sits up, guiding him to sit down and rest his back on the bed. she also only pulls away for less than a second to swallow quickly because she wants to try something. ]

[ A soft noise escapes as his own memory fades, and while it isn't a long memory, it is of something similar to this so it isn't difficult to get too lost or disconnected from her right now.

He shifts slowly so he doesn't topple over, unsure of what she wants but he follows her prompting pretty well. He's breathing a little off by the time his back hits the bed and he blinks up at her. ???? ]

[ she's not going to hurt you, merlin. don't act so scared!!

once she's sitting up too, she fixes her hair to get whatever's resting on her shoulders to her back instead. she cups his cheek, stroking it gently before she leans in to kiss him on the lips. they're slow and teasing kisses, and after some time, she moves to kiss his cheek and moves down to his neck. ]

[ Just because he looks like a startled stoat sometimes doesn't mean that he is right now!!!

His eyes flicker to watch her sort out her hair, shifting on the bed to try and get comfortable even if this is a bit confusing. He goes to open his mouth to ask what she's doing when the kisses start, and while her fingers on his cheek might soothe him a little, now he feels like those kisses aren't enough. He tries to follow, breath shaking slightly when he mouth moves to his neck.

This time he tries to not jerk away, just lets his hands move to hold onto her lightly. ]

[ her kisses on his neck are just as soft, in hopes that he calms down a bit. her breathing's so fast now though because she has no idea if she's even doing something good. hopefully, she is!! when her lips touch his collarbone, she pauses to flick her tongue against it before peppering it with kisses again uwu ]

[ It's taking every effort to not jump or anything when she keeps peppering the soft kisses on his skin. His right hand rubs her side gently, thumb encouraging her as his head tips to the side, eyes fluttering closed.

His breath shakes when he feels her tongue on the skin though, eyes fluttering open and closed again as he just waits quietly.

What is she trying to do here? ]

[ he's going to have to wait a while because all the kisses she's giving him are all short and teasing. the hand on her cheek moves down to his chest now, giving it slow rubs up and down over his shirt while the other draws circles just by the skin in his ear. she presses herself into him even more, squishing her breasts a bit in the process, but that's more than okay. for her, anyway. ]

[ His breath quickens and the hand on her side shifts to twist into the fabric of her vest. He ends up squirming slightly when her hands shift over him, spine wanting to arch, his head unsure of whether to lean into the touch or twist away. He feels hot already, more so when she presses herself into him. His teeth bite into his cheek as he tries to hold back a faint groan, his other hand reaching to tangle in her hair. ] Athena. [ It's a faint warning of where this is leading because his body is definitely starting to react. Ah. ]

[ she can feel her stomach twist when he says her name, feeling even more unsure of herself now. she pauses and lets out a breath by his ear before she drops her head next to his. ] No? [ she licks her lips and rests her head by his. if he pushes her away, then that's fine, but her tone should have suggested something else. ]

[ And now he feels bad, because her tone definitely says she wants this. He doesn't push her away, just lets his hands flatten against her back before her rubs up and down her spine. Softly, he admits: ] I'm nervous.

[ she lets go of her control over her weight and just flops on him when he responds, but she only stays on top of him for a few good seconds before she rolls over to the side. she does want something to happen, but if he's nervous, then she may as well not push things. ]

Let's just have breakfast, then. [ and just so he doesn'f have to dwell on the subject, she asks: ] Have you ever had french toast before?

[ It isn't too bad when she flops against him, but when she rolls away and ignores what he says to talk about breakfast instead, now he feels like he has 0 confidence to even try. Thanks Athena smh!!! ]

I don't know what it is.

[ But he's moving away to rub his face to wake up a bit, waiting for her by the door. ]

Let's go then. [ He doesn't even hold out his hand for her... gomen love, he just needs a few to stop being an idiot. :( ]

[ 8(!!!! THIS IS BOTH THEIR FAULTS. dw though she'll probably bring it up later :(!!

she grabs a hair tie from her desk and puts her hair up in a messy pony before heading to the kitchen, tietoeing to reach a cupboard to get a bowl. ]

They call it toast, but you actually fry it.

[ It is both... mostly because yes THEY AREN'T TALKING ABOUT IT. idiots.

He follows her quietly though, only speaking again when she explains what it is. ]

What do the French have to do with it?

[ she grabs some eggs from thr fridge, as well as a carton of milk, cinnamon, sugar, and vanilla and places all the bottles and containers on the counter. ]

I don't know. They just call it French Toast, but I doubt the French invented them. Kind of like French Fries.

[ and really. she's fine with pretending certain things didn't happen but this is just far too awkward for her. she moves to where the pans are and prepares the skillet for cooking. with her back facing him, she says: ]

And you're-- you didn't have anything to be nervous about. [ she was nervous, too!! ]

[ He watches her quietly, still not speaking much which is definitely out of the norm. It's more responding to what she says. ]

The French didn't invent fries? [ What kind of confusing world is this...

He shifts to lean against one of the counters then, tapping lightly at the counter top when she brings It up. He freezes a little, before letting out a small breath. It's only when he's sure that Ai isn't awake or nearby that he responds properly. ]

I have everything to be nervous about. I keep... [ His face twists a bit, clearly irritated with himself more than anything. ] I keep thinking about what happened last time, and I want to be able to give you more than that. I just... [ sweats ] need a little more time.

[ she cracks the eggs and starts mixing them and adds the other ingredients into the bowl, still not looking at him. like she can with such an awkward topic hanging around them. ]

You're fine. [ really!!! ] But, um, I'm sorry.

[ she looks back at him really quickly before dipping the slices of bread into the mixture. merlin, why aren't you helping!!!! ]

[ He doesn't know what he needs to do?! Tell him what to do then he'll help... obviously! ]

You don't have to apologise. [ He reaches up to rub the back of his neck. ] It isn't that I don't want... [ This really is awkward. jfc. ] It just makes me feel like an idiot.

[ YOU ARE AN IDIOT MERLIN ]

[ she walks to where he is and leans back on the counter next to him. that's when she nudges him with her elbow. ]

Don't. [ she starts fidgeting a bit and plays with her fingers. ] Don't ever think that or feel that way. You're not.

[ He wobbles slightly, but makes sure he doesn't pull away from her. ]

With that I am. I mean... I really don't know what I'm doing. [ And finally he looks a little flushed. ] I asked a friend for help but... he had to get some. Books. Nothing weird, just. I mean. Just so I have a better idea of how to make sure you feel the same kind of... y'know.

[ This sure is a lot of rambling. Rapid, rambling too I'm so sorry.

This truly isn't kitchen talk. ]

[ she pouts when he starts rambling, and she just looks up at him before poking him on the cheek. ]

Nobody knows what they're doing in the beginning. [ at least, that's what she thinks. and she didn't know what she was doing then or how to do it, either!! ] You're fine, okay?

[ He's too flustered for this, which means he just reaches to curl his hand around hers, entwining their fingers together. All he gets out though is a soft: ] Sorry. [ He's just used to being amazing ok-- kgjsdg wait ]

im so high 4 u

Oh ///

u/////////u

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